Thursday, May 21, 2009

Worship This!

Today’s topic is: Worship.

Now I know this is a monumental topic, especially when it involves yours truly.

As you may suspect, there are vast multitudes of people who worship me, and to be honest, I find it a little unsettling.

They thank me for things that they have actually accomplished all on their own.

They ask me for certain favors or perhaps forgiveness, without realizing that I am often otherwise occupied at the time.

Some of my more, shall we say “confused” followers, even have the chutzpah to think they are me—which is weird because believe me when I say being the son of the G-Man ain’t no picnic. I mean, I have an unGodly amount of responsibility. Trust me, you need that like a loch in kop.

Like many of you, I’m not very good at receiving compliments. Hey look, when you have a Dad like mine, a lot is expected of you and he’s not too liberal with the old praise-a-roo.

So, I’m not real big on this worship thing.

If I had to give some of my more overzealous followers a piece of advice, I’d say to begin by believing in yourself and your loved ones, and than take it from there.

Or if that seems too daunting at first, begin by worshipping this guy:

Because I sure do.


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